Deposing the Dancing Queen – sucking it on the Wii

It seems like we are in week 409 of the school holidays – seriously people – must Monday be a pupil free day on the back of ten days over Easter and Passover and two weeks now?  Seriously?

So, because we are running out of activities and I’m stressed to the max trying to work to deadlines and not be the crappest parent in the world, Friday night saw me conned into a game of Just Dance on the Wii.  Now in my day, I was a dancing queen.  Abba had NOTHING on me.  However, this Wii thing leaves me flummoxed.  And dead in the water in terms of my score. And according to some profile I did at work I’m a win at all costs kind of girl.  (Not something to be proud of apparently)

I battled first against Miss10 – because that way I have a hope in hell of actually winning a round.  Maybe.  Half way through the second song she threw the remote down in horror and disgust and stalked off upstairs in a huff.  Too competitive she said. And one does not like to be accused of cheating when one is merely winning.

Which left me with Miss 13.  After two songs I was convinced, but convinced! that my remote was faulty.    She gave me the stink eye before agreeing to change over.  I would be A and she would be B.  Much better.  Certain I was that the tracker on B was defs not working to potential.

To no avail.  I seemed to be doing better – translation – I was only losing by 1000 – 1500 points as opposed to the colossal 4000 of the previous song.  And then came The Power by Snap.  And the little upstart chirps, just as we’re about to start battling “Oh – that’s my song”.  Your song?  Excuse me?  Released in January 1990 – you weren’t even BORN when I was dancing in the clubs to that song.  Your song indeed.

My defeat was similar to Napolean’s at Waterloo.

Thrashed by 7000 odd points *hangs head in shame*

Thrashed by 7000 odd points *hangs head in shame*

The dance maestro then quietly asked whether I was watching the pre-emptive little men in the bottom right hand side of the screen for the moves?  Pre-emptive little men say what?


I would like to say that this improved matters somewhat but not really so.  Miss13 then decided it was time for me to redo the song on my own and she would observe and give her professional opinion on where the problem was.  Not one to say no to some personal self improvement I obliged.

To her credit she did not howl with laughter or hold her head in her hands weeping.  Her verdict: I add too many of my own moves.  Accordingly to all things Wii this is not a forum for me to be creative and shake my booty.

Disappointing is all I have to say.  Disappointing.

Disappointing is all I have to say. Disappointing.

I will leave those static and pre-emptive dance moves to the younger generation while I continue to dance on my own in my kitchen with the spagbol on the stove and where I can bust a move any which way I choose.

And for your viewing pleasure – I’ve got The Power – memory lane people – it’s always a road well travelled.

Love and light.

Lauren xxx

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