So, on Monday we went to the races. Bought my first ever fascinator, that my friend Renay’s husband calls an “astonisher”. I’m totally getting the analogy Da. Totally. In the course of the afternoon I leaned into the Big O to share some racing tips ( because I’m knowledgeable like that) and he declared that he had been klonked on the head by my Astonishment. Lucky we’ve been married since forever and I sort of understand him.
There were some choice moments in the marquee, most of which happened within 10 minutes of arrival at the table. The lovely couple next to the Big O promptly grabbed our place cards and asked him what he does at the JCA. When told he was the plus one, the gentleman confessed that he too was Arm Candy. I snorted my champagne. The Big O appeared gobsmacked. Not being familiar with this new terminology, he has been referring to himself as the Candy Arm. You be the Candy Arm sweetheart – whatever floats your boat.
My Candy Arm smugness was short lived when after I was finished explaining what the JCA does, the same gentleman (who is a rocket scientist who sells Energiser Batteries) nodded sagely and said, ” oh, so you guys must fund that Hezbollah ambulance service.” Yes, of course we do I said. The Big O wasn’t as quick to hide his actual astonishment (the real one this time) and went on to give him a brief lesson in politics and semantics. Well behaved as I am after sculling a glass of champagne I was howling with laughter. I don’t think they saw the humour and disappeared to green pastures yonder closer to the track. I do think one day that Mr Energiser has potential for a career in politics if it doesn’t work out for him in batteries.
The most exciting moment of the day was without doubt the last race at Randwick when a horse, sans jockey won by a mile and then proceeded to bolt for all he was worth towards the UNSW. Not sure what those dirty looks were about while I was yelling “run, Forest, run” . And just in case you were wondering, the horses run a hell of a lot faster without those little dwarves on their backs.
How was your race day?